Category Archives: Montessori in your Home

The MCA Parent Book Club

By Alex Chiu with Jacqueline Pisciotto and Imelda McShane

MCA is delighted to be hosting its 4th Annual Parent Book Club at two of our campuses this spring. This year’s featured book is Raising Resilient Children by Dr. Robert Brooks and Sam Goldstein. The book, selected by MCA’s Director of Montessori Development, Camilla Nichols-Uhler, provides parents with strategies to help their children prepare for the challenges of today’s world. Ms. Nichols-Uhler shared, “I selected it because Dr. Robert Brooks was a speaker at MCA several years ago. He made a very special impression and shared a lot of positive and insightful wisdom to our MCA families. His book is very practical, and I love the importance of focusing on a child’s strengths versus weaknesses.” The general consensus from the parents involved in the book club this year is that this is one of the best parenting books they have read to date.

The MCA Parent Book Club meets for one hour once a week for six weeks, and each week, one of MCA’s experienced Montessori Head Teachers facilitates the group discussion. The book club is an opportunity for parents to come together to share experiences, ask parenting questions, and discuss their concerns and hopes for their children. The teachers facilitating the meetings provide their professional insights into the conversations as well. Through this book club community, parents connect with others and build bridges between what happens at school and what happens at home. They learn new information not only from the selected books, but also from one another and the teacher leading the discussions. The teachers also help the group members grow in their understanding of how Montessori is connected to so many things and that it is not just an educational method, but a way of life.

Featured topics from this year’s book so far have included information for parents about how to:

• be empathetic
• communicate effectively and listen actively
• change “negative scripts”
• love children in ways that make them feel special and appreciated
• accept children for who they are
• help children to set realistic expectations and goals
• help children experience success and identity

Upcoming topics for the final book club meetings will include strategies to:

• help children realize that mistakes create learning opportunities
• develop responsibility, compassion, and a social conscience by providing children with opportunities to contribute
• teach children to solve problems and make decisions
• discipline in a way that promotes self-discipline and self-worth

The authors of Raising Resilient Children present real life scenarios and then recommend ways of dealing with them. Participants in the book club also share experiences and have engaged in some lively and insightful discussions during their book club meetings! As participants dig into the information provided in the book, they can consider how to apply techniques in their own family situations. Dr. Brooks even provides a self-assessment parents can take to find out if they are nurturing resilience in their children. You can find it online at: www.drrobertbrooks.com/0105.

The teachers who facilitate the meetings often find that conversations grow deeper as parents share their own parenting dilemmas. This affords the group an opportunity to brainstorm together and think about what strategies suggested in the book might help. It also allows the teacher to incorporate many Montessori approaches that are used on a daily basis at school to address certain behaviors or concerns. Parents do come to see that, not surprisingly, many of the topics presented in the book relate directly to the Montessori approach to education in so many ways. For example, a recent discussion that developed at one meeting was regarding the importance of family meals. The teacher could share classroom experiences of how the children set up their lunch spaces and eat together, enjoying not only the food in their lunch bags, but also the company of the others around the table. Parents sometimes forget that children gain skills by helping to prepare dinner, setting the table, and participating in dinner conversation. But children need modeling and guidance (and patience from parents!) as they learn these important Practical Life and social skills. The act of sharing a meal together provides a perfect opportunity for having children learn the art of conversation, taking turns with both talking and listening. And parents were reminded how being together around the dinner table is a great place for everyone (parents, too!) to practice these skills!

Our book club parents seem grateful to have an outlet for sharing parenting challenges. This community not only provides them with a place to release some of the pressures they feel in different parenting situations, but it also allows for new information to be learned and shared. The parents we see really do want to do their best by their children, and we hope that through the MCA Parent Book Club, they have yet one more resource to assist them on their parenting journey. After all, our children do not come with manuals, and many parents are looking for guidance. Fortunately, we can try to learn from one another’s experiences, glean information from some wonderful books shared by experts in their fields, such as Raising Resilient Children, and be inspired by the educational methodology set forth by Dr. Maria Montessori!

We hope to see more of our MCA parents join us for our MCA Parent Book Club next year!

Growing Up with a Grateful Heart

By Alex Chiu

Your spouse passes a dish from the dinner table to your son. You bring a tissue to your daughter when she is sniffling while watching TV. Your mother brings your child a birthday gift. As parents, our almost kneejerk response when any of these things occur is to immediately prompt our child with “What do you say?” Sometimes we do this even before the child has had a chance to process that someone has done something kind for him or her. But what do we really accomplish with that prompting? Generally, children will give the required “thank you” response you are seeking, but is there a real sense of gratitude behind those words?

To nurture a true grateful heart, we must make gratitude a daily practice with our children. It’s important for them to understand that there is so much we can be grateful for—big and small— and recognizing this at an early age helps children grow up with gratitude as a matter of course. Why is this important? Research indicates that having a sense of gratitude can help people reduce feelings of sadness, stress, and loneliness. In his article “7 Surprising Health Benefits of Gratitude”, author Jamie Ducharme outlines how gratitude can help people become more patient, reduce overeating, combat depression, improve relationships, improve sleep, and generally make you feel happier (Time Health, November 2017). And Ann Morin has her own list of seven benefits (seven must be a lucky number!), adding that gratitude can lessen aggression, improve empathy and self-esteem, and promote better physical and psychological health (“7 Scientifically Proven Benefits of Gratitude That Will Motivate You to Give Thanks Year-Round”, Forbes, November 2014).

So how can parents help their children (and themselves) learn the practice of gratitude? Let’s count some very simple ways to express gratitude at least four times throughout the day:

1. First thing in the morning: Begin the day by sharing one thing you’re grateful for that morning. Warm water to wash your hands, the sun shining, fuzzy pajamas, breakfast—model a sentence of gratitude and invite your child to think of what he or she is grateful for that morning.
2. On the way to school: Comment about one thing you see that makes you feel grateful. Recently, for me, it was having all green lights on the drive to school! But it could be anything—a car that functions, the beauty of the changing leaves, a favorite song that comes on the radio. A simple recognition of “I’m so grateful that song came on—it really brightened my mood!” is a great way to share your gratitude with your child.
3. At home after school: Express your gratitude to your child when he or she is helpful, kind, or considerate to you or any other family member. But be specific and add on to the usual “Thank you”. If your child remembers to put toys away before coming to the dinner table, you might extend your gratitude by saying “Thank you for remembering to clean up—that really helps me and shows me that you’re responsible and that you care about taking care of your toys and our house!” Invite your child to think about who has done something since coming home from school that he or she would like to thank.
4. At bedtime: Have your child share one thing about the day that he or she is truly grateful for—it could have been time spent with friends, learning a new skill or concept at school, the yummy dinner you made, snuggling with the dog, anything!

It may take some time for this habit to take hold, but if you take the initiative in sharing what you are grateful for on a regular basis, your children will very likely follow suit. And then the entire family can reap the many more than seven benefits of a grateful heart!

For a list of fun gratitude activities for the whole family, including how to make a ‘gratitude box’, some gratitude prompts, gratitude games, and even gratitude apps you can download, check out: https://positivepsychologyprogram.com/gratitude-exercises/

More information and resources on gratitude, including those used as references in this article include:
http://time.com/5026174/health-benefits-of-gratitude/
https://www.forbes.com/sites/amymorin/2014/11/23/7-scientifically-proven-benefits-of-gratitude-that-will-motivate-you-to-give-thanks-year-round/#13d897b9183c
https://tinybuddha.com/

And some lovely children’s books with a gratitude theme you might enjoy:
Did I Ever Tell You How Lucky You Are? by Dr. Seuss
Giving Thanks: A Native American Good Morning Message by Jake Swamp
Splatt Says Thank You by Rob Scotton
Sylvester and the Magic Pebble by William Steig
Those Shoes by Maribeth Boelts

Celebrating the International Day of Peace

By Alex Chiu

Once again, The Montessori Children’s Academy (MCA) will be joining with people worldwide to celebrate the International Day of Peace on September 21st. “Peace Day”, as it is sometimes referred to, began in 1981 when the United Nations General Assembly passed a resolution to have “a day devoted to commemorating and strengthening the ideals of peace both within and among all nations and peoples”. In 2001, the organization officially chose September 21st as its fixed date for the celebration of Peace Day, and the tradition continues on today.

Each year, the UN chooses a theme for the celebration, and this year’s theme is “The Right to Peace”. In our homes, in our schools, in our communities, and in our world, we hope everyone aspires to peaceful living. However, we know that peace isn’t always or easily achieved. Still, peace is something that we can all work towards with effort, practice, and guidance. Learning how to be peaceful is central to what we hope to pass on to the children we serve at MCA not just on September 21st, but every day.

Montessori education, at its core, incorporates peace education across all areas of the curriculum. From the very beginning of her research and educational practice, Dr. Montessori sought ways to educate the ‘whole child’. Every aspect of Montessori’s work was geared toward helping children in order to help the world because she believed that children were the ‘promise of the future.’ Most of us would agree with that sentiment today, and thankfully, we have Dr. Montessori’s guidance and time honored traditions to know how we can work best with children to facilitate a more peaceful world. Montessori’s educational methods and the materials she so carefully constructed aimed at providing children with ways to develop important skills and to work through challenges. The Montessori philosophy incorporates the essential ingredients needed to foster not only discovery and learning, but also peace within the child, peace within the classroom community, and ultimately, peace in the world. From Montessori’s teachings and example, we know the importance of preparing an environment for children where they learn about order, self-discipline, grace and courtesy, respect, kindness, empathy, problem solving, character, and global awareness, in addition to their academic lessons. This type of learning, this way of addressing the ‘whole child’, certainly is a path to peace.

And so we celebrate both the International Day of Peace as well as the values of Montessori education this September 21st! As is tradition, everyone at all three MCA campuses will participate in singing “Light a Candle for Peace” at 9:30AM. Should you like to mark this special day in a very simple way, you might consider taking a moment of silence at 12:00 Noon to join in the efforts of the organization Pathways to Peace to create a “Peace Wave” along with millions of others around the world to honor and inspire the work we all are called upon to do in order to be peacemakers.

As Dr. Maria Montessori said “Times have changed, and science has made great progress, and so has our work; but our principles have only been confirmed, and along with them our conviction that mankind can hope for a solution to its problems, among which the most urgent are those of peace and unity, only by turning its attention and energies to the discovery of the child and to the development of the great potentialities of the human personality in the course of its formation” (The Discovery of the Child).

May we all work together to create a world where everyone everywhere is able to enjoy and exercise their ‘right to peace’. And may we all help our children learn how to carry on this important mission. Wishing you all a happy Peace Day!

For more information about the International Day of Peace and other peace initiatives, check out these websites:

http://www.un.org/en/events/peaceday/
www.singpeacearoundtheworld.com
http.://internationaldayofpeace.org
pathwaystopeace.org

Farmers Markets and Montessori

By Alex Chiu

August is perhaps one of the most colorful months of the year, especially if you take some time to visit any number of local farmers markets in the area. Fruits and vegetables in rainbows of hues fill the baskets and tables, inviting a closer look at their beauty. Who knew there were not only red and yellow tomatoes, but orange, purple, and striped ones, as well?! Beets, red and golden, inspire something new for the upcoming week’s menu. Cauliflower, bright white, neon green, or even purple, might find its way into new family recipes. The variety of fruits and vegetables available at this time of year is such a welcome sight. Some are common and well known and loved—something to enjoy and savor again and again. Others are surprising and completely different, and they welcome us to give them a try, offering us a chance to find a new favorite to include at our tables at home.

As strange as it sounds, walking through a farmers market on a Saturday morning elicits images of a Montessori classroom. The markets are filled with colorful, carefully cultivated, and specifically chosen items, made available for us to explore, investigate, and learn from as we take our time moving from one stall to another. Our senses are awakened to the colors, flavors, and textures before us, and who can resist the beauty and opportunity within each market item? The markets are also a place for community. We meet the farmers, learn from them, and share our experiences. We might provide feedback about last week’s purchases, describe a new recipe we tried with some of the grower’s ingredients, or ask questions about additional benefits or usages for what they have brought to the market. We learn together. We see how we are different, how we are the same, and how we are connected in it all.

Similarly, Montessori classrooms invite students to do the same sort of exploration and discovery as they entice students with their carefully prepared materials specifically developed by Dr. Montessori to support child development. The materials are heirlooms of her teachings passed on to promote the growth of new generations. The Montessori materials, intentionally pleasing to the eye, draw the students’ attention and invite them to use them as they delight their senses and develop new skills. The Montessori classroom, like the farmers market, is also a community. Students and families come together to learn, share experiences, ask questions, and develop personally. Montessori students, teachers, and families also grow together as a community, acknowledging one another’s strengths and needs, and working together to promote growth in all.

So, as the summer continues on, consider taking in a farmers market or two with your child. Identify what’s familiar, and find out more about what’s new. Enjoy the fruits of the season, and make some discoveries about nature together. Before you know it, school will be starting up again. And when September arrives, even as the produce available at the farmers market changes and begins to dwindle, you can be assured that with the start of another school year, the fruits of Montessori education will continue to flourish and grow all year long.

Summertime Extensions for Exploring the Cultural Area

Montessori classrooms truly give students the world. The Cultural area of the classroom is filled with flags, globes, and maps which allow students to travel to places beyond their classroom walls. Montessori students learn about geography, land and water forms, and climate, not to mention the customs and cultures of people from around the world. Exposure to these cultural aspects opens the minds and imaginations of students. They discover the similarities and differences between their own country of origin and places worldwide. Through their cultural studies, they also gain an appreciation for things that are unfamiliar to them, and this appreciation of ‘other’ lends itself to developing understanding of and respect for all people, all cultures, and all places.

Summer is an excellent time to use the Montessori Cultural area as a springboard for continued learning. Because many of the students have already been presented with lessons in map making and simple research, parents can challenge their children to extend their cultural discoveries at home over the summer holiday. Even if your family is planning a ‘staycation’ this summer, you can all travel virtually through your participation in some of these Cultural extensions.

1. Discover your roots. If your ancestors came from other countries, summer might be a perfect time to find out more about your family’s history or about your family’s country (or countries) of origin. Public libraries generally have children’s books about places around the world, so check out a few related to your family’s own ethnic background.

2. Taste something new. As an extension, you might enjoy trying out a new recipe from one of these places. Involve your child in planning the dish, shopping for ingredients (and there are some ethnic markets that are like a trip to a foreign land in and of themselves!), and then together prepare and taste something new!

3. Map your neighborhood. Keep those cartography skills sharp and have your child create a map of your neighborhood or town. Challenge your child to identify the major landmarks (school, library, police station, favorite playground), and invite him or her to draw out the paths from home to each of these important places in your area.

4. Design a family flag. The children have learned that nations can be identified by their flags. They also know that each state in the US has its own flag. Why not design a special family flag? Think about things that are important to your family and include symbols representing those things on your family flag. Design it first on paper, and if you’re really ambitious, create an actual fabric flag to wave proudly at home!

5. Identify the land and water features you visit. Again, even if you don’t leave home, your child can look at maps of where you live and practice identifying what land and water forms are displayed on the map. Not only do we have the Atlantic Ocean along our NJ border, but the state is filled with rivers, lakes, and mountain ranges to identify.

6. Research a destination. If your family is planning a getaway to another city, state, or country, include your child in the planning, and research some of the history, geography, and culture of the place you will be going.

7. Keep a travel journal. Keeping a journal on a family trip is a wonderful way to have your child document the trip, and it is something that your child can then share with family and friends upon returning home. Drawings, notes, and collected items such as ticket stubs, photographs, or brochures can build a wonderful keepsake of your vacation.

Whatever your summertime plans, your child can continue to discover the world through a variety of activities, even from the comfort of your own home. Happy Exploring!